Black, bonkers, orange + music theory

» Not only am I pretty excited there’s a new Bauhaus album being released next week, but that the two new songs posted on their MySpace don’t overtly, or even that vaguely, suck. Which I was expecting if they did attempt a new album.

» The other day on the train I saw a crazy woman trip over a girl’s backpack and then call the girl a “fucking bitch” and brandish her bottle of juice at her. She told the girl “I seen what you done, bitch. Don’t mess with me, I’ll fucking bonk you one.” But she had to get off the train because it was her stop so no bonking took place. I was just praying no-one hit the “passenger assistance” alarm and held up the train.

» I was worried for a while there. I thought clementines season was over. But the grocery store by my work has organic ones now. I think it’s unfair to devise such a delicious fruit that isn’t available after March (so I’ve heard).

» I have this theory about music. I call it the 8-to-4 Theory of Music. That is to say music runs in six-year cycles and that quality music, in various genres, has its golden-age in the years 8 of one decade through to 4 of the following. For instance:

Hard rock / psyche-rock ’68-’74
New Wave ’78-’84
Funk / soul also ’68-’74 (reggae/dub fall into these years too)
Rock’n’Roll ’58-’64
• Alternative/college rock ’88-’94
• Post-punk revival ’98-’04 (mirrored simultaneously by Emo)
• Sample-based old school hip-hop ’88-’94
etc, etc…

In these six year periods there is often several genres producing high-quality, innovative material. The ’68-’74 period is perhaps most obviously notable. 

There is also a parrallel, though lesser, six year phenomena that fills in the gaps. Usually only one genre is taking centre stage at this time and produces fewer timeless works. Hair Metal, for instance, had it’s heyday between the years ’84-’90. Electronica took the spot in the following decade around ’94 and dying-out in time for the millennium, as did Post-Rock. Boy band and girl groups occupied this frame as well, though with a narrower window beginning in ’96 and peaking in ’98. Disco, of course, busted its move during the ’76-’80 years. Genres during the interim phase often sound dated rather than classic in later years. An exception might be the original punk rock movement which lasted roughly ’74-’80, and eventually morphed into another interim phase, hard-core punk (’84-90). 

My point is that it’s ’08 this year so I expect something exciting to start happening.

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6 Responses to Black, bonkers, orange + music theory

  1. ms_dirtnap says:

    Jake, that’s how fruit works.

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