Black, bonkers, orange + music theory

February 29, 2008

» Not only am I pretty excited there’s a new Bauhaus album being released next week, but that the two new songs posted on their MySpace don’t overtly, or even that vaguely, suck. Which I was expecting if they did attempt a new album.

» The other day on the train I saw a crazy woman trip over a girl’s backpack and then call the girl a “fucking bitch” and brandish her bottle of juice at her. She told the girl “I seen what you done, bitch. Don’t mess with me, I’ll fucking bonk you one.” But she had to get off the train because it was her stop so no bonking took place. I was just praying no-one hit the “passenger assistance” alarm and held up the train.

» I was worried for a while there. I thought clementines season was over. But the grocery store by my work has organic ones now. I think it’s unfair to devise such a delicious fruit that isn’t available after March (so I’ve heard).

» I have this theory about music. I call it the 8-to-4 Theory of Music. That is to say music runs in six-year cycles and that quality music, in various genres, has its golden-age in the years 8 of one decade through to 4 of the following. For instance:

Hard rock / psyche-rock ’68-’74
New Wave ’78-’84
Funk / soul also ’68-’74 (reggae/dub fall into these years too)
Rock’n’Roll ’58-’64
• Alternative/college rock ’88-’94
• Post-punk revival ’98-’04 (mirrored simultaneously by Emo)
• Sample-based old school hip-hop ’88-’94
etc, etc…

In these six year periods there is often several genres producing high-quality, innovative material. The ’68-’74 period is perhaps most obviously notable. 

There is also a parrallel, though lesser, six year phenomena that fills in the gaps. Usually only one genre is taking centre stage at this time and produces fewer timeless works. Hair Metal, for instance, had it’s heyday between the years ’84-’90. Electronica took the spot in the following decade around ’94 and dying-out in time for the millennium, as did Post-Rock. Boy band and girl groups occupied this frame as well, though with a narrower window beginning in ’96 and peaking in ’98. Disco, of course, busted its move during the ’76-’80 years. Genres during the interim phase often sound dated rather than classic in later years. An exception might be the original punk rock movement which lasted roughly ’74-’80, and eventually morphed into another interim phase, hard-core punk (’84-90). 

My point is that it’s ’08 this year so I expect something exciting to start happening.

Paper trail

February 25, 2008

» Strange thing about the copy of Neuromancer I got out at the library. Has the receipt from Chapters tucked into the cover. I guess the Toronto Library likes to go shopping. I’m reading it because I’m still way in the double digits on the wait-list for Spook Country. Turns out, other than the classic opening line, I don’t remember Neuromancer at all. I certainly don’t remember it being kind of bad in an juvenile kind of way.

» 53 Mondays is now available in Toronto at Soundscapes (572 College street). 

Removal + burnt

February 22, 2008

» All evening the cavalcade of snow removal machines decided to park in front of our house and idle their engines. Three idling dump trucks are sufficient to drown out a DVD and annoy the occupants. I give you this information in case you ever need to “smoke out” a nest holed-up of terrorists in your neighborhood and want to be more direct than, say, blaring Spice Girls at them. After idling, unmanned, for three hours they left to pollute the air above some other part of the city. At least they did not have their alarm-beepers incessantly honking like yesterday morning.

» At 4 am they returned with their alarms beeping and engines idling. Well, at least the sidewalks are all clear this time.

» As soon as the trucks left, it started snowing.

» This photo of Queen Street was taken from the roof of Nicole‘s office building by… I don’t know who by. Someone in the building. Or on top of it.

Fire + snow

February 21, 2008

» The theme of the week seems to be fire. Jane Subway Station was on fire the other morning when I got there. And, of course, there was the little matter of Queen Street burning down yesterday.

» This morning we were kept awake by the snow plows clearing the snow banks along the sidewalks. The plow itself didn’t make much noise but it was the warning beep (like those used by delivery trucks when they back up)  that sounded like an alarm clock, only louder. It seemed to go on for about an hour. But one supposed it had to be done and not having three foot high mounds of mucky ice along the road would be a welcome thing. I did notice though, when I walked down to the subway station, they’d for some reason only plowed directly in front of our house. And though there were no longer snow banks, an even layer of slush and mud was now spread carefully over the previously beautifully cleared sidewalk.

New store, sickie + timed response

February 17, 2008

Originally uploaded by Ampersand Photography.

» Finally got the new Pandanoids store open. Slightly different product than on the Cafe Press store (which I plan to phase out). It’s located on the intermesh herebaouts. To celebrate, shipping is FREE for the first ten orders.

» Nicole‘s been sick. Since I brought the bug home, I’ve been trying to take care of her. Mostly I’ve forced her to watch bad movies like Don’t Say a Word and The Contender which I picked up at the new library branch they opened on our street. It has the self-serve check-out which is rad but a bit spooky. Since you just pile your items on a pad and it scans them automatically. Too much science. It means, though, you don’t have to deal with nervous librarians like the one at the Deer Park branch who wears surgical gloves and refuses to check your materials out unless you stand back and push the books towards her. 

Starting Time: 9:58am
Name: Jakob

Sisters: 0
Brothers: 0

Eye Color: blue grey
Shoe size: 7 and a half or less

Height: 5’3.75
What are you wearing right now: Green ringer T, Jeans

Where do you live: Tronto.
Favorite letter: Z

Favorite Month: November
Favorite Breakfast: Pizza and/or chocolate

Have You Ever…
Bungee jumped: No
Made yourself throw-up?: Yes. I don’t believe in suffering through nausea. Just get it out.
Gone skinny dipping?: I don’t even go fat dipping.
Broken a bone: Might have broken my little toe. Never officially diagnosed.
Been in a police car: I think on a grade 3 field trip.
Been on a plane: yes
Came close to dying: Sort of. Almost poisoned by ex. Also bicycle accident.
Been in a sauna: No.
Swam in the ocean: Yes.
Fallen asleep in school: a few times
Broken someone’s heart: oops.
Cried when someone died: No.
Cried in school: yes. also at work.
Fell off your chair: Does it count if the whole chair fell over?
Saved e-mails: Bank vaults full.
Been cheated on: Yes. I used to be a doormat.

What Is…
Your room like: Nicole keeps the bedroom clean. I keep my studio/office a nightmare.
Whats right beside you: left – inkjet printer. right – korg micro.
What is the last thing you ate: pizza. lindt ball.

Ever Had…
Chicken pox: vaguely.
Stitches: in the palm of my right hand.

Do You
Believe in love at first sight: yes. in intial attraction at least.
Like picnics: usually
Like school: never again.
Like anything: uh… yes.

Random Questions
Who was the last person you called: Nae
Who was the last person you danced with: Nicole in the kitchen. Sort of.
Who makes you smile: Nicole
Who did you last yell at: I don’t yell.

The Do’s
Do you like filling these out: Sure. I seem to do it a lot.
Do you wear contact lenses or glasses: Gogs.
Do you like yourself: I think highly of myself.

Almost done…
What are you listening to right now: Nicole hacking.
What did you do today: Made coffee. Pounded on Nicole’s back to loosen the phlegm. Didn’t work.
Hated someone in your family?: No. I don’t know anyone in my family well enough to hate them.
What car do you wish to have: More free time.
Where do you want to get married? maybe in my parents’ garden. in fact my mom will insist.
Good driver?: used to be alright. haven’t driven since august (yay!)
Diamond or pearl: pearl inlays on a guitar.
Indoors or outdoors: depends.

Yesterday Did You
1. Talk to someone you like: since, contrary to popular opinion, i like most people, yes.
2. Buy something: groceries.
3. Get sick: no. nicole did with a vengeance though
4. Sing: a little. sort of.
5. Talk to an ex: nope.
6. Miss someone: Nope.

Last Person Who…
7. Was in your bed: Nicole. It’s her been too though.
8. Saw you cry? Nicole
10. Went to the movies with: Nicole
11. You went to the mall with: Nicole

Have Your Ever…
16. Ever been in a fight?: not really
17. Been to California: 3 times
18. Been to Mexico: nope
19. Been to Canada: well, yes.
20. Been to Africa: hell no. not until they stop killing people.

The End
22. What books are you reading right now: Belleweather by Connie Willis
23. Best feeling in the world: music
24. Future kids names: Jake for a girl. Gwendolyn for a boy.
25. Do you sleep with a stuffed animal: Nicole is a stuffed up animal right now.
26. What’s under your bed: I have no idea. Blankets… maybe
27. Favorite sport to watch: America
28. Favorite location?: 388 Jane St.
29. Piercing/Tattoos: no.
30. What are you most afraid of right now?: Fear is the mindkiller.
31. Who do you really hate?: Hate is also the mindkiller.
33. Do you have a job: not just a job, a career! temporarily anyway.
32. Ever liked someone you didn’t have a chance with?: hahahahahahahahahaha. aparently that was my “schtick.”
33. Are you lonely right now: no. I’m very happy.
34. Song that’s stuck in your head: one of those beth gibbons songs.
35.What’s the first thing you notice about the opposite sex? shoes. i’m always looking at the floor.

Time Finished: 10:17

total time: 19 mins minutes.

Go-go gadgets

February 15, 2008

» You can now add The Urbane Decay to your iGoogle.  If that floats your boat, that is. If it’s the kind of thing that gets you out of bed in the morning, that is.

» An iGoogle gadget for this here blog is at the aforelinked words “this here” but since you probably have this here blog on your that there friends list, it may well be a bit redundant. 

» It’s been a slow morning at work.

Branch Day, Valentine’s Day + Elevator Man

February 14, 2008

» Yesterday was a team-building day. It wasn’t nearly as painful and angering as the Maximum Yield team-building day of last year. For one, the speaker was more amusing and less of a douchebag. If just for the fact he had the exact mannerisms, facial expressions and cadence of Tom Cruise, but in Prince Harry’s body. His name is Stuart Knight. He spoke to us on  “The Art of Powerful Conversation.” Basically he taught us how to be invasive in a  way you can’t get away with unless you’re a slick, smarmy bastard like himself. We were forced to ask each other questions like, “What would you change about yourself” and  “What have you cheated on” and “What is your biggest regret.” Otherwise, we ate a lot of chocolate and gummy worms and drank a lot of coffee. I did get to speak to Older Rockabilly Dude who I’d wanted to for a while as he rolls the cuff of his jeans into unreasonably small ringlets and has mutton-chops to rival Wolverine. He’s cantankerous as fuck. Pretty awesome. The Ozzy doppelganger from the 18th floor wasn’t there I noticed. I’m curious about what his deal is.

» Today is Valentine’s Day and I got an awesome home-made card and a veritable mountain of Lindt.

» The old janitor dude who acts as the “elevator usher” is back this morning. He pushes the button and, for our benefit, points to the elevator which has obviously arrived by the fact it has dinged and the doors are opening while holding a grimy rag in his other hand. He’s pretty rad but i’m not convinced he’s employed by the building and I always wonder if he’s fishing for tips.

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