Prima-fucking-donnas

~ DWE want to play at 7pm at that party now. I would assume they only play for about 20 minutes so show up punctually or you will totally miss out. I mean totally miss out.

~ I hate the office dog. His name is Spike and he is a disgusting animal. I’ve decided I am only allowed to hate one creature at a time and he is it. Until further notice.

1. Is your second toe longer than your first?
Counting from the inside or outside?

2. Do you have a favorite type of pen?
I am fond of virgin Sharpies.

3. Look at your planner for January 26, what were you doing?
Designing the Industry News

4. What color are your toenails usually?
Pale fleshy pink. Maybe a little yellow.

5. What is the last thing you highlighted?
Hydroponic store addresses I deleted from the back of the magazine.

6. What color are your bathroom towels?
Several dark green. One white.

7. What color are the seats in your car?
Marooooon.

8. Have you ever had a black and white cat?
A grey one.

9. What is the last thing you put a stamp on?
A letter.

10. Do you know anyone who lives in Wyoming?
No.

11. Why did you withdraw cash from the ATM the last time?
Just for kicks, actually. 

12. Who is the last baby that you held?
Uh… Can’t even remember. Probably one of my cousins nearly 20 or more years ago now.

13. Do you know of any twins with rhyming names?
No! But if I ever have twins…

14. Do you like Cinnamon toothpaste?
God no. That’s disgusting.

15. What kind of car were you driving 2 years ago?
’85 brown Chevette.

16. Pick one: Miami Hurricanes or Florida Gators?
Airborne aligators launched bodily by a hurricane in Miami.

17. Last time you went to Six Flags?
I haven’t even been to Four Poles in about 20 years.

18. Do you have any wallpaper in your house?
I think there’s some under the red paint in the red room.

19. Closest thing to you that is yellow:
Hi-lighter of question #5 fame.

20. Last person to give you a business card?
Uh… I think Katherine Patton. Via the mail system. Months ago.

21. Who is the last person you wrote a check to?
my landlords

22. Closest framed picture to you?
Probably one of the hideous floral ones in my boss’s office.

23. Last time you had someone cook for you?
Do americanos count as cooking?

24. Have you ever applied for welfare?
No, but I was insured against employment for a year.

25. How many emails do you have?
Personally, I have 401 from one person. About 160 from other people. On my work email I have about 50,000.

26. Last time you received flowers?
Uh, never?

27. Do you think marriage is meant for only a man & woman?
Of course not!

29. Do you play air guitar?
Only when trying to demonstrate a rhythm to someone.

30. Do you take anything in your coffee?
No. I like my coffee like I like my women: dark and bitter.

31.Do you have any Willow Tree figurines?
Any what? I don’t know what those are but I think I can assume no fucking way ever.

32. What is your high school’s rival mascot?
A whale.

33. Last person you spoke to from high school?
Stephen.

34. Last time you used hand sanitizer?
I don’t know if I ever have. Disinfectant soap yesterday perhaps.

35. Would you like to learn to play the drums?
I am still teaching myself.

36. What color are the blinds in your living room?
Off white.

37. What is in your inbox at work?
I bunch of stuff I’ve already done but haven’t moved to the “in progress” box or the “did” box.

38. Last thing you read in the newspaper?
Something about something that didn’t make enough of an impression to be remembered.

39. What was the last pageant you attended?
Pageant? My prom?

40. What is the last place you bought pizza from?
Mambos?

41. Have you ever worn a crown?
Paper christmas cracker crown.

42. What is the last thing you stapled?
The proof of our Australian edition.

43. Did you ever drink Clear Pepsi?
I thought it tasted like Tab.

44. Are you ticklish?
my goodness yes

45. Last time you saw fireworks?
Bath Tub weekend?

46. Last time you had a Krispy Kreme doughnut?
Never have.

47. Who is the last person that left you a message & you actually returned their call?
Carissa.

48. Last time you parked under a carport?
Too long ago. Scraping frost off the windshield is balls.

49. Do you have a black dog?
When I was a kid we had a black dog.

50. Do you have any pickles in your fridge?
Pickled hot peppers.

51. Are you an aunt or uncle?
Never will be. No siblings.

52. Who has the prettiest eyes that you know of?
Tom Cruise

53. When was the last time you saw a semi-truck.
This morning.

54. Do you remember Ugly Kid Joe?
That kid from school? That’s mean. He wasn’t that ugly.

55. Do you have a little black dress?
I’m not that kind of fellow. I do have a little red velvet dress though.

Last survey of the week, I promise:

1. Of all the bands/artists in your cd/record collection, which one do you own the most albums by?
Either Swans or Pet Shop Boys

2. What was the last song you listened to?
Bauhaus —  ‘St. Vitus Dance’

3. What’s in your record/CD player right now?
Badawi — Jerusalem Under Fire

4. Do you know what music the person before you is into?
Before me? What the hell? As in “this person I see before me?” There is no one before me. If it was Pentti (who’s not here today) it’d be Queen and Blondie.

5. Who are your favorite local bands?
Phoebe, Bash, DWE, etc

6. What was the last album you bought?
That Bloc Party cd. It’s very Coldplayish.

7. What was the greatest show you’ve ever been to?
The Cult.

8. What’s the worst band you’ve ever seen in concert?
One of the nameless faceless rabble of canadian touring bands who’ve come through the Cambie.

9. What band do you love musically but hate the member(s) of?
Seems like a weird question. James Brown, I suppose.

10. What is the most musically involved you have ever been?
I’m only musically involved.

11. What shows are you looking forward to?
That NALT show at the legion on the 23rd should be fun.

12. What is your favorite band shirt?
I used to love my Portishead shirt.

13. What musicians would you like to hang out with for a day?
Pet Shop Boys

14. Are you a stalker?
No, I can take a hint. If it comes in the form of a restraining order.

16. Sabbath or solo Ozzy?
Be serious.

17. 80’s Madonna or Kabbalah Esther?
I like the Pet Shop Boys remix of ‘Sorry’

18. Punk rock, hip hop or heavy metal?
Sabbath

19. Name 3 timeless records?
The first Sabbath album; In The Flat Field — Bauhaus; any of the first four Bolan albums.

20. Name 3 artists that suck?
To quote the person I stole this from: “Nickleback (ew) they’re the only band that I think deserves that title. There’s bands I don’t like but I wont say they suck…” Yeah, they really do. I just remembered when I saw Chad Kroeger on MTV Cribs and he patted his bed and called it the “workbench” and I think maybe winked. May have been the only time I’ve literally puked in my mouth. James Blunt is pretty rank too.

21. Did you know that filling out this survey makes you a music geek?
I knew that already.

22. What was the greatest decade for music?
68-74, 76-82, 87-91, 97-2001

23. How many music-related videos/dvds do you own?
A dozen or so.

24. Do you like Journey?
Steve Perry’s voice gets inside me and makes me giddy. I try to dislike Journey, but am unable to.

26. What is your favorite movie soundtrack?
Until The End of The World

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20 Responses to Prima-fucking-donnas

  1. mrdapper says:

    it’s some kind of terrier/spaniel cross.

  2. mrdapper says:

    it very well by my least liked in a long series of unliked dogs.

  3. Anonymous says:

    Question 27

    Who am I

  4. Anonymous says:

    Question 27

    Who am I

  5. mrdapper says:

    Re: Question 27

    Some creepy anonymous commenter. Perhaps someone in a same sex marriage? I’m too sleepy to figure out this riddle.

  6. ms_dirtnap says:

    re question 9, don’t you mean an envelope? This editor thing is really starting infultrate my life.

    • mrdapper says:

      oooh. you have foiled my cleverness with your editorialness. yet i think one could argue that a “letter” could be defined as the envelope and the missive it contains.

      • ms_dirtnap says:

        Fair enough on that one, but what about your statement that your friends fed you a pointed stick of wood, such as those used to anchor a fence or hold up beans in a garden? Is it perhaps more accurate to say they made you a steak?
        You know the trouble with this game is maintaining impecable-ness myself, which is completely impossible.
        It is amusing how much delight I take when noticing editing mistakes in other newspapers, especially hip ones like Discorder and such.

      • mrdapper says:

        confusion of confusions! That was left over from the person whom I stolened this survey from! I’m changing the answer to my very own now!

  7. ms_dirtnap says:

    re question 9, don’t you mean an envelope? This editor thing is really starting infultrate my life.

  8. mrdapper says:

    oooh. you have foiled my cleverness with your editorialness. yet i think one could argue that a “letter” could be defined as the envelope and the missive it contains.

  9. ms_dirtnap says:

    Fair enough on that one, but what about your statement that your friends fed you a pointed stick of wood, such as those used to anchor a fence or hold up beans in a garden? Is it perhaps more accurate to say they made you a steak?
    You know the trouble with this game is maintaining impecable-ness myself, which is completely impossible.
    It is amusing how much delight I take when noticing editing mistakes in other newspapers, especially hip ones like Discorder and such.

  10. mrdapper says:

    confusion of confusions! That was left over from the person whom I stolened this survey from! I’m changing the answer to my very own now!

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