New product profile

There’s something slightly disturbing about this hydroponics product profile:

“Its putting 15% more body fat on cows when fed to the grass on dairy farms. Imagine what it will do to your crop!
Beneficials Bio-Link Plus is HydroGardens way of re-introducing a wide range of naturally occurring beneficial microbes and fungi that have long since largely disappeared from the environment. These naturally occurring organisms aid in the natural process of plant growth and development. Beneficials Bio-Link Plus is made using a unique sophisticated brewing process that helps maximise the microbe colonisation and shelf life of the product which offers the maximum benefit to growers and their crops. As well as increasing plant growth and quality, Beneficials Bio-Link Plus strengthens plants making them more able to withstand insect attack.”

Advertisements

10 Responses to New product profile

  1. atrophe says:

    sounds like that drug in The Corporation, with the executive video advertising how it increases profits etc

  2. atrophe says:

    sounds like that drug in The Corporation, with the executive video advertising how it increases profits etc

  3. mrdapper says:

    the idea you can do anything to grass that will make cows 15% fatter is terrifying.

  4. aporia says:

    oh c’mon, what about melted butter? and flavored salt shakers.

  5. kenholiday says:

    ketchup shakers are the fucking bomb

  6. mrdapper says:

    vinegar spritzers are ultrabomb.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: